In our quest to be pleasing to others, we may end up role playing the version of ourselves we think will garner approval even when it doesn’t feel congruent for us because we feel that is what is expected. In these moments, though, we are not being ourselves. We are performing ourselves. Our current “you do you, boo” era suggests that we each should pick our personalilty out and wear it as something separate from us—as a role we play rather than as an expression of who we spontaneously are in that moment. This leaves us feeling detached and lifeless, often leading to apathy and a fear that nothing means anything.

Julie L. FutrellJanuary 2, 2023narcissism, psychology, psychoanalysis, community, therapy, talk therapy, psychotherapy, mindfulness, new year's resolutionsComment

Deepening Your Self-Awareness in the New Year

If we can reframe what the purpose of resolutions are, perhaps we can actually engage in a process that helps us deepen our connection to ourselves and to our true desires. Resolutions, by their nature, tend to close things off. “I resolve I will not do X anymore!” The problem is, they rarely open us up! At the beginning of a new year, we are most filled with the wonder of what might happen in this new year. Why not ask some questions that help expand the world and your being?

Julie L. FutrellJanuary 13, 2022psychology, psychoanalysis, community, therapy, new year's resolutions, new year's questions, talk therapy, self-awareness, growthComment